Why Salesy And Self-Promotion Are Not Bad Words

Sales is not a bad word. Salesy is not a bad word. Self-promotion is not a bad word. All of these are not bad words in the business world. 

Especially for female business owners to reflect on and own their power in these words. 

Almost everyday I hear women in business discuss how they feel being ‘salesy’ is a bad thing, or ‘self-promoting’ means something bad about them or the person talking about their business. 

Salesy = seeming as if you are selling someone your products.

Why Being Salesy Is Actually A Great Thing

Learning and understanding how to sell your products, support, and/or services is not optional in business. 

Everyone is a sales person in business, everyone in business is also in sales.

I have had personal experience in seeing some clients and some people in our online communities truly desire to gloss over understanding this phenomena, especially if we do not feel we are particularly great at ‘selling’. 

It also seems statistically that self-identifying women feel they are less great at sales than men.

These are some examples of comments that have been told to me in the past, related to sales, self-promotion, and being salesy

I’ve often heard these from female founders on why they would rather avoid selling, avoid seeming salesy, or avoid self-promotion, which are often beliefs that go a lot deeper than taking these reasons at surface value:

  • I cannot charge that much. 
  • She needs my help (referring to a prospective client), and she is having a hard time financially and in life. I cannot enforce my prices and time management with this client because of what she is going through at this time.
  • I’m afraid to talk about my business on social media, what if people think I’m bragging, what if they think I’m trying to say I’m better than them.
  • I won’t allow other women to talk about their business in my Facebook group because what if they take business from me. 
  • Can you believe how much (fill in name) is charging for her programs, is it worth it? 
  • I heard (fill in name) is charging this much for their program, what is your opinion about how much they charge? 
  • My ideal clients are everyone, everywhere, I don’t want to niche or leave anyone out.
  • If I’m salesy or come across too strong, I don’t want to take away from someone else making money.
  • I want to help my clients by not charging them too much.
  • If they wanted my service they would ask me, I don’t need to ask them.
  • If I send a DM to someone saying anything about myself, that sounds salesy.
  • My ideal clients will reach out to me. I don’t need to put myself out there.

I want to break some of these beliefs or comments down, that are above. 

A lot of them come from fear, and a ‘lack of’, and/or a ‘lack’ mindset. 

There are many resources on our podcast about manifesting and coming from an abundance mindset and how to get there, here

Also, some great tips on being salesy in the best way possible are as follow, yet not limited too:

  • The next time you see someone posts something online relating to your expertise, please, please say something in the comments, or dm them.
  • The next time you see someone post something in a Facebook Group you can relate too or have expertise in, please comment on their post or comment, or dm them.
  • Join resources like Quora to speak your mind, ask questions, and display yourself as an expert there. 


Prove Marketing And Business ROI

100% of coaches and female-led businesses who implemented Empire Life’s business strategies in client leads, monthly income (often a 20X increase from when they started with Empire Life’s support), and client retention after having Empire Life Mentorship, apply here.


 Reminder: Where we focus our thoughts and what we think is where energy flows. 

Let me give an example of the reminder above:  I believe money is energy and we all have a personal relationship with money. Therefore, we need to treat money as a best friend, as a lover, as a romantic partner, as well as possible, and nurture the flow of energy of money in and out of our lives, and be grateful for what we have…

What is more commonly taught in society is to focus on what we don’t already have…instead of how far we have come and what we have.

If we focus on what we do not already have, the inner dialogue becomes mostly circling around ‘lack’, producing a ‘lack of’ mindset.

Some common lack mindset thoughts people might start to spiral on are:

  • Why am I not a size 2 yet, I’ve done every diet possible, why is my body not capable of becoming skinny, similar to (fill in the name of a person whose weight you admire). 
  • Why am I unable to save X (fill in the number) amount of money every month, it always seems there are too many expenses. 
  • Why don’t I have X (fill in the number) of clients, and make X (fill in the number) of money every month, similar too (fill in the name).
  • Why do I always have bodily aches and pains? I need more energy.


For the female businesses who are scaling, who are already making over $20,000USD-$40,000USD per month, there needs to be a different and unique level of support, just for you. This leads me to our mastermind (doors opening soon!!), and masterminds in general to be a part of, and contact us and apply here.

Here are examples of the flip side to the comments and thoughts above for thinking in an ‘abundance’ mindset:

  • I love the size I am, my body does so much for me everyday. Going to keep on being healthy and taking this one day at a time.
  • I saved X this month which was a true feat, next month I will aim to do better.
  • I have X amount of clients and they are incredible. I’ll get a testimonial from them, and I’m sure my clients will expand.
  • I made X amount of money this month and that was more than last year, or the last year at this time. I’ll continue to make more, and money flows easy to me.
  • I’ll take a hot bath with salts and other relaxing items in the bath and this will aid my muscles and body to feel better. I’ll get more sleep. 

If you love hearing about money mindset make sure to check out our blog and our best-selling book.

Letting Go Of What People Think Of You

People are going to think what they think, if we are clear in our intentions, and our value and worth, we can healthily take up space. 

We must take up space. Own our space, and our voice. And celebrate our wins!

It is natural to care about what people think of us in some situations. 

We want to put our best foot forward most of the time and come from good and clear intentions. When we do this, we can let go of the rest. I mean after we do our best then we can let go of others reactions, let go of others projecting onto us, and live fully in our truth.


With heavily investing in ourselves there is also no need to invest in multiple online courses which are not geared for the woman scaling her business. 

There are mastermind and online courses primarily for the female founder who is just starting out. Where we guide them in finding and solidifying their ideal client, their client avatar, and hone in on their exact message, their true essence and bringing this to the world, in our Empire Life Blueprint Online Course, here.


Have you had a chance to grab our best-selling book, with women stories of their rising to success, and Redefining their success.

If you want to be featured in the upcoming book RECLAIM, Series 2, are you a female founder, with an incredible story to share with millions to inspire them, apply here.


Hoping this article finds you well, and as always we love to hear from you in the comments!


You can also find more information about Allison Ramsey, Facebook Digital Marketing Professor & Empire Life Founder at Instagram, LinkedIn, Website, and Twitter

To learn more about getting started with Empire Life in launching and scaling your online empire you can contact Allison, Founder of Empire Life, on Instagram and LinkedIn.


We must take up space. Own our space, and our voice. And celebrate our wins!.

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