what to do when a loved doesn’t support your dreams
As a creative person there are always one million ideas circling around my head and a surging powerful buzzing energy of inspiration. We are grateful for the creativity sparks visiting us often, having multiple downloads a day from the ethos.
Here in this article I will guide you on processing this phenomenal energy you have buzzing in and out from the ethos and how to handle when people around you may not fully grasp your way of being or your ideas. When this person might be a loved one or teammate whom you passionately will love to be on board with your ideas.
We will guide you here on letting go of the expectations of other people fully understanding your dreams, visions, and ideas. This article is for those who have felt unsupported by those around them and need guidance on navigating their ideas.
YOU ARE COMPLETELY ACCOUNTABLE FOR YOUR FEELINGS
This is a challenging way to see life sometimes because people have the capability to say or do crappy things, this is outside of our control. How we choose to see the situation, what we tolerate, how we communicate and react all depends on us and this is within our control.
Processing our triggers is essential to being able to let go of anger in the moment, understand what is happening, let go of resentment or past hurts, and focus on healthy communication.
More on this topic of letting go of triggers and not taking things personally are here.
HOW TO BRING UP IDEAS TO LOVED ONES
When bringing up ideas avoid making accusatory definite statements such as, “Oh here we go again, you ALWAYS say something unsupportive. You ALWAYS make me feel like a fool for my ideas!”
You might feel this way in the above statement, yet when we make definite statements we are boxing people in. We are not allowing them the space to grow, improve, or to learn how to support us the way in which we feel loved and happy.
Definitive statements lead to defensiveness, anger, and these statements reflect to others how we already have a set way of viewing them.
It does not encourage them to try to support us because we are stating they are ALWAYS unsupportive, therefore they will feel demotivated to try.
We want to still respect those we love and give them the space to learn how to support us.
Let’s say we brought up an idea to our partner, husband, wife, boyfriend, and they answered in a snarky way to dismiss our idea.
We’re upset, and feeling unsupported in our ideas, we can say something such as, “I understand I’m super excited about this idea! And you might not fully understand why. Please be patient with me as I process this. I will feel supported by you listening right now, I have not fully processed everything yet, so can you hold back on your feedback for the moment?”
Or a simple phrase, “Am I overwhelming you right now with my enthusiasm about this, maybe this is not the right time?”
If you are aiming to share a great idea, also it is a smooth transition to ask for the space, by saying something such as, “Oh ya, also, this amazing idea came to me today, do you feel now is a good time to share this with you?”
Give them the space to say yes or no because you want them to fully hear you when you share your ideas. If they had a long day and are slightly foggy there will be no space for them to process what you are saying.
If they say, “I’m having total brain fog right now, super exhausted, can we focus on relaxing right now before we sleep?”
Be open to waiting for them to have the space to fully process your ideas.
One of our Empire Life clients let us know recently that she keeps a trello board titled, ‘not right now, yet will get too,’ there she documents all her ideas as they flow in. She said she learned that her husband might get overwhelmed when she continuously shares new ideas with him. Therefore when she processes them on her own first before bringing them to him they have a much smoother communication and they both feel supported.
EVERYONE PROCESSES IDEAS UNIQUELY
Everyone on this Earth has unique ways of processing information. Some people learn by doing, by hearing, by writing and taking notes, and others by watching a video, none of these are wrong or right.
Some people will feel overwhelmed when you tell them an idea in a loud, excited, and crazily passionate way, others will wonder why you are telling your idea in a more processed logical way and why you are not shouting passionately about it.
Depending on how someone processes information will relate directly to how they react and receive our ideas.
YOUR IDEA MIGHT THREATEN ANOTHER PERSON’S SAFETY
We are all wired to handle different levels of safety. People who think outside of the norm, the box, often face quite a bit of resistance. This resistance is not personal, often it is because the person you are talking to might feel threatened by your ideas.
If this person has followed what they felt was the best path and often care a lot about others think and then they see you living in a different way. You may experience resistance and opposition by this person because indirectly they will most likely feel the need to question their life.
When you are living to be in your highest self, with pursuing personal development, pursuing professional goals, and aiming to understand yourself increasing your self-awareness, others around you will start to rise up too or they will start to experience resistance. How we were raised, our cultural background, our personal life experiences all contribute to our ability to handle risking our safety.
Aim to be patient with someone’s appetite for safety, security, and risks. Some people find working for someone else extremely risky, others find having your own business risky.
Realize there is always a way to make your dreams come true with or without others support. There are millions of people out in the world willing, ready, and already believing in you, we need to continue to show up for ourselves, support ourselves and they are already here. If you need support in scaling your business, get in touch with Empire Life, more information below on getting in touch.
HOW TO GET IN TOUCH
“Realize there is always a way to make your dreams come true with or without others support.”
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